ECW (4/22) Recap: Family Matters!
Our resident philosopher, Jay Shannon, takes us ringside for all the Extreme action.
Tonight’s show came from the Land of Flair, Greensboro, North Carolina. I’ve been to Greensboro and it’s absolutely one of the most beautiful areas of this country. The title montage started the show.
Kelly Kelly, dressed in neon blue bikini top and pants, bounced to the ring. She was joined by her partner, Tommy Dreamer. We looked back at last week, when Tommy was pulled from a match with Mike Knox in favor of Colin Delaney. Knox totally destroyed Colin with the Knox U Out finisher.
Layla strutted her way down the ramp, dressed in shiny black top and black pants. Layla showed incredible flexibility as she entered the ring. Layla’s partner was Mike Knox.
Tommy Dreamer & Kelly Kelly d Layla & Mike Knox
Mixed Tag Team Match
Layla pounded on Kelly’s back and locked in a Full Nelson. Kelly broke free and kicked Layla in the face. Layla rushed over and tagged out. Kelly made it to her corner, as well. Tommy came in and beat on Knox. Knox reversed an Irish Whip, but Tommy kicked Knox in the face. Knox bounced back with a Clothesline. Knox rushed at Tommy who hit a boot and a Bulldog.
The girls tagged back in. Kelly hit a high Crossbody but Knox made the save. Kelly tried for the Rocker Dropper, but Layla reversed out. Kelly ducked a Clothesline and then did hit the Rocker Dropper.
Grade: B
Mike Knox rushed in the ring and attacked Tommy. He planted Tommy with the Knox U Out.
We got a quick promo for Smackdown, where Batista will try to take the gold from Undertaker. Sadly, a lot of fans will miss the show due to baseball games. I know it’s America’s pasttime, but I really don’t like baseball. Maybe it’s because Nevada doesn’t have a team. Either that or 27 years of the Texas Rangers being the home team soured me to the sport.
We looked back at the political speeches of the Presidential candidates from last night. We saw clips of the “real” Hillary, Barack and McCain. Mike Adamle thanked all three for doing the wrestling-oriented speeches. I still question why WWE would promote politics to a lot of kids too young to vote. Go figure that one out.
We then saw the entrance of John Morrison. Miz seconded his tag team championship partner to the ring. Adamle talked about Morrison’s “8-Pack Abs”. Miz threw some respect towards Mike Adamle. Shannon Moore and JImmy Wang Yang came to the ring. Yang was set to battle the tag champ. Adamle, in his infinite lack of wrestling knowledge, called Shannon “Kofi”. He’s just got to get better. He sure couldn’t be any worse.
Jimmy Wang Yang d John Morrison
Morrison elbowed out of a Go Behind. Yang hit a Hurancanrana out of an Irish Whip. Yang then Cltoheslined Morrison over the ropes. When Morrison got back in the ring, he grabbed a Headlock. Yang got free and went for another Hurancanrana, but Morrison hooked the leg on the LeapFrog and slammed him. Guess Morrison has watched a few old Rick Steiner matches.
Morrison grabbed the leg but ate an Enziguri. Yang hit a Flying Monkey Flip. Yang got hit with a Back Elbow. Yang went to the top rope, but Morrison hit the ankle. Yang went to the mat. Morrison tried for Split Legged Moonsault, but Yang moved. Yang then hit his Moonsault Press from the top rope to pick up the win.
Grade: A
We went to the Raw Rebound. It focused on the King of the Ring tournament. It started off well, but fell apart in the Semi-Finals and Finals. William Regal won the match by forcing C.M. Punk to tap out to the Regal Stretch. The tournament featured MVP, Chris Jericho, Finlay, William Regal, Hornswoggle, C.M. Punk, The Great Khali and Matt Hardy. There really weren’t any decent top name stars in the tourney. Triple H, Undertaker, Edge, Orton and others were thrown in an 8 man battle. The 8-man should have been the King of the Ring contenders. This was yet another example of poor booking by WWE.
Tazz threw congrats out to Regal. We then took a look at the Backlash card. Kofi Kingston was warming up in the back. Shelton Benjamin walked up to talk with the Jamaican Sensation. Kofi offered a handshake but Shelton refused. Shelton asked Kofi about him being unbeaten. Kofi acknowledge his unbeaten streak. Shelton looked at him and said “That ends tonight”. We went to break.
Kofi Kingston ran to the ring as Mike Adamle talked about Ja maican me crazy. Sigh. The crowd showed their support of Kofi. The tone turned sour as Shelton Benjamin walked down the ramp.
Kofi Kingston d Shelton Benjamin
Shelton took Kofi to the mat by the Hair. Kofi kipped up and hit a huge Dropkick. Shelton grabbed a Headlock. Kofi sent Shelton to the ropes. Shelton caught Kofi and nailed a Shoulder Breaker. Shelton focised on the arm of Kofi. The crowd went wild for Kofi.
Shelton hit a knee. Kofi went to the ropes and hit a Crossbody. Shelton hit a Flying Arm Bar.Shelton threw Kofi to the ropes. Kofi hung on and flipped Shelton over the ropes. Shelton hit a reverse Hot Shot on Kofi. Shelton climbed the ropes and launched. Kofi hit a Dropkick on Shelton, on the way down!
Shelton recovered and locked in a vicious Arm Bar. Shelton fliipped Kofi around by the arm. Shelton Freight Trained the Jamaican. Kofi ducked a Fore-arm by Shelton and nailed the Trouble in Paradise (Buzzsaw Enziguri) out of nowhere to take the win. That sudden ending screams an injury.
Grade: A- (It would have been higher if not for the sudden ending)
We saw that absolutely ridiculous match with Lexie Fyfe playing Hillary Clinton. The best thing about the whole stupid thing was when Umaga came out and destroyed both of them.
Mark Henry d Nunzio
We didn’t get any kind of introductions for this match. Mark Henry just went after Nunzio from the get-go. Mark Henry hit a Headbutt on Nunzio. Henry stomped on Nunzio. Henry tossed Nunzio into the corner. Henry threw a straight fist and then bounced Nunzio off the corner turnbuckle, several times. Nunzio was set of the top turnbuckle. Nunzio jumped off and got caught in a Bear Hug. Mark Henry finished things up with The World’s Strongest Slam.
Grade: D
We saw a grinning Kane in the back. He was set to talk with Edge, next.
We saw another look at the European tour. Our dearest friends in the world live in Leeds, England. I raise my glass of tea to Lady Jane and Ray.
Edge made his way to the ring with his posse, the Edgeheads, in tow. I liked Ryder and Hawkins better when they were the Major Brothers. At least they wrestled. Edge shook hands with Ryder and Hawkins.
Edge told the home audience that they weren’t on the wrong channel. Edge had brought The Cutting Edge to ECW. He talked about beating Kane, last night. Edge then introduced the ECW champ. The fires exploded us Kane entered the ring. He set off the corner post pyros. Kane picked up his mic and stared at the Rated R Superstar.
Edge started talking about “family” in the industry. Edge talked about the Brothers of Destruction. Edge cringed as he talked about Undertaker being the World Champion. Edge talked about the fact that Kane’s parents must be proud. Kane growled “My parents are dead and if you mention it again, you may be too”. Edge gave a quick history lesson about Kane’s relationship with his brother. He talked about Lita leaving Kane for Edge. He also brushed by the whole Katie Vick thing, too. Edge talked about how Kane has been intertwined in Edge’s life. Edge talked about how he was going to marry Lita and Kane spoiled it. He also talked about how Kane injured Edge and cost him the World title. Edge then thanked Kane for the injury because it brought him together with Vickie. Edge went on a bizarre rant about Chavo being his nephew and Ryder/Hawkins being sons to him and Vickie. Ok.
Edge stopped and told Kane that La Familia would be reclaiming their “family heirlooms” (the ECW and World championships). Kane threatened Bam Neely that if he got near him, Kane would destroy him. “After Backlash, the only remaining member of your family would be your fiance, Vickie Guerrero, all by herself. Don’t worry, me and my brother will take real, good care of her…I promise”. Edge and the Edgeheads attacked. Bam and Chavo jumped in, as well. It was a straight up mugging. They held Kane down. Edge handed a chair to Chavo for a Con-Chair-To to Kane’s knee. Chavo spent a long time taunting the ECW champ. Chavo whacked the leg oof Kane, over and over again. Kane screamed in pain. The crowd cut loose with a deafening “You Suck!” chant. Kane clutched his knee in agony. Bam grabbed the ankle of Kane. Chavo used the chair on the knee, one last time. The heels exited the ring, clutching a destroyed steel chair. Kane’s face was a mask of tortured pain. We faded to black as Kane stared at La Familia.
Final Grade: B-
Final Thoughts:
Well, ECW was a little easier to watch this week. Mike Adamle kept quiet for most of the night. As far as the action, it was mediocre, at best. Thankfully, the Cutting Edge was short. I really think that either Kofi or Shelton was injured during their match. With the way that Shelton worked on Kofi’s shoulder, I would put my money on a shoulder injury for Kofi.
We had to look back at the whole Clinton/Obama situation. Strangely, I had my head down, last night, when the “real” Obama started doing his political speech. I actually thought it was The Rock on the screen. All three looked really dumb throwing out all the wrestling catch phrases. McCain actually made me laugh. I waited for him to cut loose with a “Whooo”.
Well, Backlash is this Sunday. Kane may be working with a bum knee in his match. Surely, the writers aren’t going to give the title back to Chavo. I kind of expect the possibility of C.M. Punk vulturing the title away from Kane. Punk is due for a heel turn. I’ll have all my predictions for you, later in the week.
–Jay Shannon
JayofPWD@SBCGlobal.net
(4/23/08)
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